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Jardine Funeral Home Ltd.
8 Princes' Street West, Box 343
Fenelon Falls, Kawartha Lakes, ON K0M 1N0
Phone: (705) 887-3130
Fax: (705) 887-3262
Jardine Funeral Home Ltd.
8 Princes' Street West
Fenelon Falls, Kawartha Lakes, ON CA
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Below is a list of questions and responses that we commonly receive at the funeral home. We will continue to include any new questions in this section that we feel would be helpful to others.
If you have a question that has not been covered in this site we would like to hear from you. You may use the "Ask the Director" section of our site to forward your question or comments to us.
If you would prefer to call us on the telephone, our staff would be pleased to provide an answer to any funeral related matter you may have. If we do not have the answer immediately, we will find it for you and contact you the minute the information is in our hands.
|Question #1||I am several months past my loss now. Most days I do very well. Then all of a sudden I become overwhelmed. Is this normal?|
|Answer:||Certainly. Grief can be analogous to waves hitting on the shore. At first, the waves are large and powerful and they knock us down. As we work through our greif, the waves begin to subside to a degree. When we haven't noticed any for a while, we know that we are succeeding in rebuilding our lives. If we know this is normal and part of our grief process, we can recover from the waves sooner and learn to expect fewer of them in our future.|
|Question #2||I'm so absent-minded since my husband died. It seems I can't remember a thing anymore. What causes this?|
|Answer:||When a crisis befalls us, our mental and emotional resources are flooded with a constant stream of thoughts, anxieties, fear and uncertainties. We are trying to find logical mental processes to deal with the changes in our lives caused by the loss. Eventually, we'll sort it all out and arrive at ways to begin problem solving. When this occurs, we will find that our efforts to concentrate soon return.|
|Question #3||I have lost my purpose for living since my wife died. What good am I anymore?|
|Answer:||It's natural to feel purposeless after a major loss, particularly when a spouse dies. There is such a total adjustment required that day-to-day life seems to have lost its meaning. We are cut off from everything we know as "normal". But each of us is a whole and complete person. We have a life and a purpose unconnected to the deceased. It is difficult to keep this in mind when we have lived closely linked to another. We can help ourselves by reading self help guides and by attending a bereavement group, if possible.|
|Question #4||Recently widowed, I'm noticing some of my women friends act funny when I'm around them and their husbands. How could I be a threat? This really hurts my feelings.|
|Answer:||There are many reasons for these feelings. Sometimes, it is because they are insecure in their own marriages, but often it's because they see you as a widow now and worry about how they will survive a loss like yours. You represent something they'd rather not think about. Spend more time with those who support you and make new friends among those who also have been widowed.|
|Question #5||My children tell me I must rid the house of my late husband's things. I can't bear to part with them. Is this so unusual?|
|Answer:||There are no rules about when to clear out closets and personal articles. I advise people to do that chore when they feel ready for it and to postpone it until they feel the time is right. Our children may believe they are doing us a favor but until we are ready for the "favor" politely decline. You will know when the time is right to make this adjustment.|
|Question #6||I read somewhere that men are apt to suffer more from a spouse's death than women. Is this true?|
|Answer:||It is usually true if you ask a man. It is usually not true if you ask a woman. Both sexes experience the same grief process and the same emotions. The differences lie in the kind of social support that is available. |
When a wife dies, the widower not only loses his primary relationship but his social relationship as well. He may be less able or willing to recreate these connections for himself, and therefore isolation may be a pattern that evolves for him.
|Question #7||What are some of the "normal" signs and symptoms of grief?|
|Answer:||Everyone experiences grief differently and there are very wide ranges of "normal" behaviors. Some report feelings of distress and deep emotional suffering. Others refer to longing and loneliness as primary symptoms.|
|Question #8||I'm very disappointed in my adult children. Since their dad died they haven't done much to ease my pain or loneliness.|
|Answer:||When we are lonely, it is easy to wish that our children or others will fill the void left by the absence of our spouse. The reality of the situation hurts but we must realize that the lives of others are going on uninterrupted. Adult children are busy in the pursuit of their own lives. Take on the responsibility of fulfilling your needs and expect less from others. You'll soon find it a benefit.|
|Question #9||What is Cremation?|
|Answer:||Cremation is performed by placing a single casket or container into the cremation chamber where the temperature is raised to approximately 1000 degrees Celsius. The technical process through heat and evaporation reduces the human body to its basic elements of bone fragments. These bone fragments are further reduced by mechanical means to create uniform particles to permit placement within the urn. The crematorium, insofar as possible, tries to recover all cremation residue from the cremation chamber and other equipment. Any metals from the casket, or identifiable body prosthesis are separated and disposed.|
|Question #10||Is Cremation less expensive?|
|Answer:||Cremation is often considered to be an inexpensive, less complicated substitute of the "traditional" funeral. Many people believe that at the time of death two basic choices exist: immediate cremation of the body or a complete funeral including viewing, followed by burial.|
Cremation and burial are both defined as "modes of disposition," methods of caring of the deceased and, as such, are just one part of the funeral services. As times change, trends change too. Today, many opportunities exist for meaningful services for the benefit of family and friends - both before and after cremation takes place. Cremation and its many "Options" may reduce the cost over traditional funerals that require earth burial. These charges will vary in accordance with each person's or family's desires. Your funeral director can offer current information on cremation costs and will, at the time of arrangement, provide a complete listing of charges for the services you select.
|Question #11||Should we have a funeral service?|
|Answer:||It is encouraged that if a person is of a specific faith, that they contact their minister as soon as possible after the death. While clergy have been trained to assist in this area, a family member or close friend may lead in the service or assist by giving a family tribute. The service might be composed of a message by a close friend, family reminiscences, the deceased's favourite music, poetry or readings. It is worth bearing in mind that while having a family member lead the service may offer comfort to the other members of the family, it may also place a heavy burden on the person leading the service. Consider the options carefully and discuss them with your funeral director. Here again your funeral director will be able to suggest someone in the community to consider and assist you with this type of service.|